Personal History

Hello dear readers.

As many of you know, I have been doing stand-up comedy at open-mics for a while now. Now it is time to see what I can do on my own.

That’s right. I have my first ever solo stand-up comedy show! And you’re invited! (Except for you. You know who you are. Why do you even come here still? Just to check up on me. I’m fine. Ok? I’m fine.)

Here’s the scene!

The Joseph Richards Show starring your host, Joseph Patrick Richards, is coming your way for a night of improvisational stand-up comedy where anything can happen.

Join us September 11, 2015 at Bad Ass Coffee (3530 South State Street in Salt Lake City, UT). Show starts at 7pm.

With special guests:

Tom Foreman, World’s Foremost Observational Comic.

David McDavid, Raconteur and History Monger

See you there I hope!


Bay, sighed

I live in Salt Lake City, UT. I do my best to avoid complaining about the city and the state because they are full of some wonderful people and good food. However, my spirit rarely soars in such a place.

Enter, California. More specifically, the Bay Area.

My partner is out here for a board meeting and I decided to join her for the trip. I am rethinking the round trip ticket.

Waiting for the BART to take us from the Oakland Airport to Berkeley, we meet a woman from Cairo who is doing summer semester at Berkeley in computer science. She studies computer engineering back home. She has not NOT seen the sun in 24 hours. We ride the train with her to Berkeley. I help her carry her heavy suitcase up the BART stop stairs.

We take an Uber to the Hotel Durant. The driver is from Tibet and he tells us the temperature sometimes reaches minus 15 degrees Fahrenheit in his home country. He gives us a thumbs up as he takes our suitcases from the trunk in front of our hotel.

The hotel lobby is striking. One can sit and relax there. The two men at the front desk are young and bond with us. One asks us if we are here for the Ed Sheeran concert. We are not. He loves Ed Sheeran.

Our room is a muted yellow with blue accents. A poster of The Graduate and a canvass painting of science-y artifacts adorn the walls. I will never want for anything more again.

We take Uber to the Downtown Berkeley BART station (fastest Uber ride yet) and take the train to the Powell Street stop in San Francisco. We join one other person. A man who smells of alcohol offers to give us directions to the Italian restaurant we seek. He has lived in the city 52 years and “should know [his] way around.” We tell him our destination and he says we should probably just walk up the street and turn left. He gives us “Veteran’s honor” that this is the way to go. We walk away and he follows, asking for money.

We take another Uber from the Powell Street trolley car turnaround to Washington Square Park. The driver is young and laughs in a deep voice at our jokes. See example:

K – What’s the name of that place downtown? They have stuff there. Um. It’s tall and white and iconic.

Me – Bill Nye?

Uber Driver laughs heartily.

We walk through Little Italy to a place one of us suggests. It is her family’s favorite place. The restaurant is boarded and has a warning on the door to clean up the graffiti.

We wander around Little Italy looking for the right place to eat dinner. Nothing strikes our fancy until we find one that is (a) within eyesight, (b) relatively cheap with a good menu and (c) open without a line. The place is Sodini’s and it is perfect.

The man who greets us is pure Italian stereotype. His hair is slicked back, his black shirt is open to reveal a gold necklace on a pillow of chest hair. He tells us we can eat at the bar and he shakes my hand as we walk to our seats. He tells us to enjoy ourselves.

Sodini’s is dimly lit. It has dark wood and the feel of a family restaurant. The bartender seems comfortable serving drinks to any member of the Rat Pack. He tells my partner they don’t have any mixes when she asks for a Mojito. I drink a perfectly-poured Guinness.

The server calls us all darling and my dear and tells us to literally yell if we need anything. We each order a different linguini dish (linguini with marinara, linguini with clams and linguini with seafood). The food is unimaginably delicious and the portions are generous.

A man and a woman sit at the bar next to us, each with a glass of red wine. The man begins speaking with us. He is Bruce. She is Ann(e). They have four kids between them. I am pretty sure he has triplets, one of whom is getting ready to go to Fort Benning, GA. She has a son who just graduated from college in Bozeman, MT. Bruce and Ann have been together six years, though they have known each other for eight. The conversation was light, fun and familiar. I want to bump into them again and buy them each a drink.

We get pastries and coffee and take another Uber back to the Powell Street station. The Uber driver is not familiar with the city yet, but does well. His left arm is in a bandage cast. I intend to ask about it, but choose not to do so.

We take the BART back to Downtown Berkeley. An Asian couple, the woman rubbing the head of the man in a gentle, loving way. A blond woman, already tall, imposing in high heels. A short, blond woman smartly dressed. A man with dreadlocks under his camouflage cap, he eats potato chips. A lesbian couple in matching San Francisco Giants attire. The city is alive. The city is magic. I will never go home.

We take our final Uber of the night from the Downtown Berkeley station back to our hotel. The driver is an Asian man who seems so young we ask if he is a student. He is not, but he gets asked that quite a bit. Once, he was in Reno. His friend was gambling and our driver was just standing there holding a beer. The dealer asked to see our driver’s ID. Our driver could not believe it. Our driver does not sleep much. Usually four or five hours a night, often falling asleep and waking at different times on different days.

The city is alive. It is full of people with families, lives, opinions and sleep patterns. I may never leave.


*written at a desk in the Hotel Durant while looking out over Berkeley